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Thursday, July 9, 2015

The 5th Anniversary of our engagement/I've been blogging for a year now.

I know I'm a little late in posting this. But life threw us a few curve balls we weren't expecting. So I've been trying for the last few days to sort some things out. Don't be alarmed or unduly concerned, readers. Amy and I are both still healthy and well. And the storms we are experiencing are sure to pass given a few more days or so.

What I wanted to focus on in this post is a couple of wonderful milestones I marked over Independence Day Weekend. First of all, but not most importantly, I've been a blogger since my first post last July 4. The blog has been a great way to keep those who follow it informed not only of important developments in our personal lives, but also about major news items from and about the LDS Church. It's been a thrill to blog, knowing there are so many people who care about what I have to say. You, my readers, are the reason I blog. That and I've not been very diligent as a journal keeper, so this blog has served as an outlet for me to be able to preserve all the important details of my life and the work of the Lord, which I love with all my heart. Thanks for your continued support and interest in this blog.

That being said, as many of you are aware, Saturday July 4 marked the 5th anniversary of our engagement day. We celebrate each such anniversary in a very unique way. On the first anniversary of our engagement, I expressed to my sweet Amy a desire I had to propose to her anew every year. In this way, we have another thing to celebrate each Independence Day: we become engaged all over again. Of course, of the five "reengagements" we've had, none can compare with the joy of being married and having one another to be with, take care of, and love. I thought I loved Amy on the day we became engaged, and even more so when we got married 5 1/2 months later. But what I felt for her then is a mere drop in the bucket compared to my feelings for her now, as we near the 5th anniversary of our marriage, which we will celebrate on December 18 of this year.

Each day with her makes her more dear to me than I ever thought anyone could be. She is the first face I see when I wake up every morning, and the last sight I have before I drift off to sleep every night. For over 5 years now, she has been my best friend, my biggest  fan, my most trusted confidante, and the reason for all the wonderful things in my life. She has encouraged me in every pursuit I have undertaken. She has stood by me as we have weathered the storms of life. She has taught me by her example what it means to see people as the Lord sees them. She loves me unconditionally, even when I have tried her patience or have said or done anything stupid or insensitive. She willingly deals with the consequences of decisions I have made, even when those decisions may have not been in our best interest. She is so patient with and kind to me.

I have often thought and told her that I may still be physically disabled, but, because of her, I am whole. For a long time before she came into my life, I always  felt there was something missing. Then she came into my life, and nothing was missing anymore. I told the Lord long before she came along that if I could just find someone who would love me and look beyond my disabilities and everything else wrong with me, I would happily accept her as an eternal companion. Amy is all that and so very much more. As I often try to tell her, I could look the world over from here to eternity and back again, and I would never find anyone as perfect for me as she is.

So reproposing to her every year on the day of our engagement reminds me of the innumerable reasons I love her. It helps me evaluate how I'm doing as a husband to her and whether I could or should be doing things differently or better. It helps me remember the treasure, the real gem I have found, who is worth anything it takes to help her be happy. I hope she can feel from me even just a small portion of what I feel for her. I am so blessed that Amy Nuttall consented to be my eternal companion, and I hope and pray that someday I will be worthy of her.

My beloved Amy, I hope you never doubt how much I love you. You give me a reason to press forward in life, no matter how rocky the road may be. When I am afraid, you give me courage. When I feel lost and alone, you give me companionship. When I am worried or troubled about anything, you help me feel better. You have given me your complete devotion and trusted me with your heart and your life and your love. I marvel every day that out of all the men in the world you could have chosen to spend your life and eternity with, you wanted me. No one could ever take your place. I don't ever want anyone else. You are the miracle I prayed for for so long. You are a companion and a help meet in the true sense of the words. I never imagined I'd be so lucky as to be bound eternally to someone as wonderful and amazing as you are. My love for you is beyond my ability to express. I hope that I may someday prove worthy of you. Thank you for all you are and everything you have given me. I love you, my precious Amy, now and forever!